woohoo!

quick post:

really really glad that Construction Tech project is over. it was quite a huge pile of workload to clear. and of course, no more Hoola to "manage". haha.

Had Cost Estimation tutorial today and had to present a question with Joyce. My grpmate was quite happy with our performance coz "the tutor never ask us questions right??" haha...but it was good la. think i starting to get the hang of presentations as i do more of them. haha everyone is like a challenge for me to overcome and when i do well, the satisfaction is hard to be substituted with anything else.

Went to Xiaoqian EMERGE with Ernest and Lynn and Joyce. Frankly, it has been long i had such a nice dinner. Good food, good company, good place (though it was a hawker centre but hey who say must spend alot of money for ambience!) i had a really good time catching up and relaxing. =)
Check out the indian rojak:

Ernest gorging himself:Lynn & Ernest:


Train-shot...bunch of ku-kus who nv take NEL before:
ID please:

Xiaoqian's EMERGE concert. WHAT A BLAST. Everyone was high and enjoying themselves but coz i didnt know many pple there and also partly due to the fact that im not a fan of chinese music, i was kinda bored. AND my dumb camera was not working properly. keep saying full memory when i clearly didnt take many photos! argh...bored, frustrated and tired, i headed home..we ALL headed home in fact. (me, joyce, ernest and lynn, xuemei, diva, tsz ching) OH YES...i actually forgot about mentioning xiaoqian. She was excellent. her song item was energetic and i think she was kinda brave to sing and dance in front of such a huge audience! well done xqq...and yes...those curls....suit her well i must say but...but...i can NEVER understand girls who rebond their hair and then curl them afterwards....

Star of the night:

Check that out--> Black-white-black-white...haha

Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf

At Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf now...at 2140, at Bishan Junction 8, on a Sunday doing work....sounds sad eh? Haha but not exactly...kinda enjoy the fact that i am able to do work at such a crowded commerical place without being chased out by the staff. :) Armed with a cup of Black Forest ice-blended drink and internet AND power socket...i could stay here forever man. haha...the only discomfort is that it's freezing cold in here! arghh...cold to the point of shivering! reminds me of SDE's IRC....which doesnt stands for "Information Resource Centre" anymore but, "It's Really Cold"! hahaha.. ok lame lame...

This weekend has been really good, mainly due to a public hoilday on friday. On Thursday night, went to church for service. Though it was very far plus it was super late plus i was tired, i didnt regret going for service. :) Was strongly reminded of Jesus's sacrifice for all of us.

On Friday went to Starbucks at One Fullerton with Grace to do work, despite of my plans of resting at home. Went home and received news that HELLO, my brother was suddenly leaving for Australia the next day! That ass....he didnt even bother informing his own brother la...He somemore leaving at 7am on Sat morning. I was too tired, didnt bother sending him. Sleep more impt wahahaha....

Sat, managed to catch up on some rest time. Not much work done but shiok la. At night went to Xqq's grandfather's wake. Went there instead of consoling xqq, i ended up asking her alot of questions on the Buddhist practices and "customs"...found out from her that Xiaoqian and the rest of her family are not going to wear anything nice for the next 3 years...YES! 3 YEARS....i clarified twice and thrice and yes it's really 3 years cannot wear pink clothes, red...or any bright colours...now why would anyone wanna do that to themselves??! hmm..xqq would say: "aiyah, my mother say one mah..nebermind la..."

Looking at the week ahead...i'm going to brace myself for the flood of projects, presentation...blahblah bloobloohhh.......

Happiest Man in Singapore

Site Visit number 2 this SEM! Wow we are really fortunate to go for so many site visits this semester and every one has been really enriching! The first one was at MRT Circle Line (at NUH) and today's was at Queenstown RC. It was a project done by Surbana and is a HDB residential estate. Standing at a proposed height of 40-stories, it was really a sight to stand at the foot of the block looking at the almost-completed apartments. (see pic)

One of the HDB block at Queenstown RC. Look at the gigantic tower crane. Check out the HUGE tie-members connecting the crane to the super-structure. COOLIOZZzzzz

Prior to the site visit, we visited the HQ of Surbana. A consultant company that provides construction advice and blahblahblah..(cant really rmb lol) Basically they provide consultant Project Managers la...the whole interaction was very good as we good get a REAL feel of how it was like to work as a PM in the construction industry. And as i was talking to weichen, it is really a breath of fresh air to see and touch the real stuff rather than sitting behind our comps and textbooks and visualizing the construction process..the machines...and WC said that she cant imagine those professors in our school who spend much time doing research behind their comps, in their little office space..haha i agree but maybe they also bored of dealing with construction projects day-in day-out...think we too kan chiong also la..haha



Anyway i was on the way home after Life Meeting in school (crusade stuff), and was watching news on the bus when i heard a news about some research company that is going to look for Singapore's Happiest person. Can u believe it?? How to quantify happy? and why would anybody want to do that? Ohh..actually as i listened further (to the news), the company stated that in Spore, 9 out of 10 pple were stressed out. 9 out of 10!! wow...that means if u pick 10 pple out of a crowd, only one of them can say they are happy with their life. The rest: too stressed out to stop and think if they are happy.



That got me thinking. Am i happy? Or am i just living day by day, taking things as they come...rushing projects, studying, going for lecture...without actually taking in what exactly am i doing. Or rather, why am i doing all this? Sometimes, i complain that there's so much work and not enough rest and wished that i can fast-forward uni life and get on to working. But will i really be happy when i start working? with all the various projects on hand i need to handle, with all the much heavier responsibilities that i need to bear, will i not complain and be stressed out too?

I think the answer lies simply in learning how to enjoy what i am doing now, in what we are doing now. Find joy in doing projects. Find joy in working with pple that you dun really clique with. Find joy and pleasure in the comfort of researching for random topics online. Find joy in reading textbooks. Find joy in learning more. Find joy in being a student. haha..only as a student can we have ridiculous amount of time to research on a topic, to take our time to read up on sth we are interested in.. So i say to all those who are reading this now: ENJOY THE PROCESS! dont be so caught up in rushing for projects, in getting that A+ or THAT grade that will pull up ur cap. Coz at the end of the 4yrs in Uni, when u start work, you want to have good memories to remiscence on, to smile and say to urself, "yeah, i had a great time in uni!" Anyways, for most of us, this is the last time we are going to be a full-time student. =)



So, ask urself, "Are you enjoying the process?"

meatballs no more

oh shucks...sadness to the MAX...me, huifang and weichen ALL conveniently forgot about our korean class on Monday evening...and now we gotta cancel it and forget about our meatymeatballs... :(

The weekend came and gone just like that....i cant remember doing much work but at least i managed to clear up the pile of papers on my desk that was such an eyesore for a few weeks already! haha...

Today's service was great. Had a speaker from the mainland China to share his experience with us. He was called Yang "chuan dao" (which roughly translates as "a person who shares the gospel in full-time time ministry") It was rather good as he could share real life experience of how Chinese Christians were being "bi1 po4" (persecuted) in China. (History: CHina as a communist country had a "wu shen lun" belief. The CCP promoted Atheism throughout the country and forced the citizens to not believe in ANY God. They had esp much problems with Chirstianity because of their determination and strong faith) He shared about how this chinese woman that was sent to prison just because she believed in Christ and the prison guards humilated her and tortured her in various ways. They tied her arms behind her back 24/7 and removed her of her ability to use her hands. She had to eat like a dog, go to toilet without cleaning up and she couldnt even comb her hair...But yet she stood firm and continued to have faith and trust God. Eventually, He provided and she somehow or rather could bend her arm (like what u see in those circus acts where those pple can move and contort their arm as if their bones were soft). She could comb her hair, feed herself and could go to the toilet. The prison guards were so amazed and shocked at the same time. Subsequently, they removed the handcuffs and freed her hands. Well, thank God for this testimony to remind us how lucky we are in Singapore to practice any religion without fear of being persecuted. =)

i just learnt a new song! Actually it's not very new la...it was written in 2006 by Hillsongs..just that it's new to me. haha. The title is called "You are my World". Love this song coz it sounds rock-ish but yet the words are meaningful. Hmm..i plan to teach it to the youth group in my church soon! :) [if any of u are curious about this song just click this link to watch it on Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gX36X1lTjiw&feature=related)

Swedish Meatballs

Wow what a day....many things worthy of remembering...Here are the highlights:

Super Boring Research Mtds lecture. Half-way or if not most of the time, i dunno what she was talking about. All i can remember is dunno what Anova. haha...they should have arranged the test to be before the lecture. But maybe like what Joyce said, That *ahem* Lady Goh-with-the-weird-smile *ahem* might have opposed violently when Kua Han Wei suggested to arrange the test before the lecture. Haha..poor HW...

TEST. So relieved that this test is finally over. Although it was only a simple quiz thats open book, it has been bugging me for ages..something to note: i blanked out 25mins into the test. You couldnt guess why...it's sth so dumb la! I couldnt find the particular chapter to refer to for my last question and before i could find it, the lecturer said; "5mins more..." i kan-choinged and blanked out. The last question suddenly seemed foreign to me. I tried my very best to remained calm but my heart only pounded faster and faster. macham just sprint 400m round the track...2 mins before the test ended, i found the stupid notes which was on my table the whole time. -_-" I rushed the question and finished it just as Mr HW was collecting the last of the papers. wooooshhh...

Joyce's advice: "please file your notes...."

Fast forward>>>Subway for lunch. Project meeting with Hoola. Measurement Lecture.

Gary's Mum's wake. Because of the test, i didnt go with the rest of the de pple to the wake. So did huiche-i mean huifang and weichen and Joyce. We left sch tgt with David mak and decided to take the train to AMK and bus 138 to the place. (this was after MUCH help from Joyce's on-the-ball parents.haha) :P [Eventually we changed plans to take to Sembawang and take 167]

We had dinner at clementi and made our way there. The journey there was very good. I had much fun catching up with the girls. Seems like i was the "evil" guy that always mistreats weichen! haha...but no hard feelings ay? all in the spirit of good fun la. :D

Right, back to Gary...He was on the whole okay and looked like he was holding up emotionally quite well. I wouldnt vouch the same for his physical health as he lack of sleep and mental stress can wreck ur body real good. One thing that was evident: He had much emotionally support from his relatives and extended family. He told us he now has 5 God-mothers! Just imagine the fussing and showers of love from these women! hah..oh well thank God for that. He also told us that he was rather mentally prepared for the inevitable to come. Although he of course wished for a miracle to happen, he knew that his mum was going soon...

Then he told us about the cock-ups in the hospital. My goodness....after hearing that, i would not want to go near SGH at all! Here was what Gary related to us:

Cock-up #1) The machine that measures a person's heartbeat was faulty. Although Gary's mum stopped breathing, her heart was still "pumping". They thought she was still fighting very hard for her life and continued to stay vigil by her side. But after 5 hours of not breathing, her heart was still pumping! how can right??!! Even her body felt icy cold already! they asked the nurse and she said it was normal....wa lau i building student also know humans cant go long without air and what more 5 hours!! Chui la the nurse...They then called the doctor and only after he checked the machine that he realised the machine was spoilt and Gary's mum in actual fact, passed away 5 hours ago...imagine the horror and shock of Gary's family...there u are talking and thinking ur loved one is still alive but actually she passed away already! 5 hours ago!!seriously...SGH...machine cost no need to save until lydat lah.

Cock-up #2) After the doctor decided to change the machine, the nurses had to remove the electrodes attached to Gary's mum chest. Without any warning or any attempt to draw the curtains, the nurse proceeded to undress her in front of all the relatives and children!! and even after that, they didnt replace her clothing! Only when Gary told them to button up her blouse did they do so...and they didnt even bother to do it properly.. sigh..what more can i say...even a deceased person deserve some respect, what more in front of her family...

Cock-up #3) They simpy labelled her body wrongly. With someone else's name. If Gary didnt check, they would have jolly well received a wrong body at the wake...sheesh...i thought only this kind of thing happen in movies...SGH system of work needs to be revamped man....

Lastly, something random: I successfully took 3 (yes THREE) buses all the way from the North, Ang Mo Kio and back home in Boonlay!!! haha...hurray to the bus concession club! LOL..but it took me a total of 1 hour and 30 mins plus minus to reach home. Hmm long travelling time but i like long bus rides, esp through unfamiliar places... :) Just for the record, i took 167 to MacRitchie with the girls. Changed bus 52 to Clementi. Took with hf. and subsequently 185 back home! haha...small triumps in life! :D

Sweeee-dish meat baaallssss.....


Oh im so looking forward to Monday.. The pfm gang are going to have dinner at IKEA after m&e proj meeting!! Swedish meatballssss here i come!!!! hahaha....siao

Hoola hoola

i love today. Dunno why. Maybe coz i had enough sleep. Maybe coz the weather was cooling and fresh. Or maybe, it was just the inner peace of God. :)

Project group work can be very much of a tricky business sometimes, especially when it comes to choosing who to work with. Selecting people from your clique might be the most convenient option but sometimes people whom you can get along very well, might not be the best people to do serious work with. Some might be lazy or sloppy in their work and being on very good terms with them might make it hard for you to be firmer with them. And some just possess different work frequency from you. Why work? Coz although you can talk and go crazy about practically anything rubbish under the sun, you just cant understand them when it comes to discussing serious "deep thinking" work. And they are just some who have just plain different working style from you.

Then there are those times when you have no choice but to do group work with people you never knew existed in the course or people you know them by face but never got to talk to them or know their name. Doing project with these people is like turning those traditional 1 toy "vending machine", where you never knew what they are going to give you. If you're lucky, you'll get enthu groupmates who seems more kan chiong then you with the project, but if you're not, then you'll get those that you rarely see even in lecture! Like i have one groupmate now...(shant say names here...lets call that person Hoola) Hoola hardly comes for lecture so when we have those last min project meetings, Hoola will be conveniently left out! And even during meetings, Hoola will jsut seat in a corner and hardly participate! Macham supervisor role sia!! haha...

Yes...choosing the right person to fit your working style is indeed difficult and sometimes, we might not even find that person! Hence, it will be better if we can be more accomodating and patient...understanding that not everyone has the same working styles and for that matter has the same priorities and commitments....but that of course it is easier said than done... Just imagine: in the future in our line of work when we have to work with colleagues that u cant clique with at all, or clients that change their mind every so often! So i guess this kind of thing: handling people and peers is something that we all have alot more to learn about..

oh one more thing before i end this post..Really glad that i went for Rev-up today. Felt so refreshed just listening to God's words and singing hymns of praise halfway during the mad rush of work and deadlines...Feel so blessed also to be able to enjoy real fellowship with the crusade people, talking to them about school work and encouraging each other not to give up and to have more faith! :) God just provides! :)

Oh yeah, really glad Weichen went for Rev-up today too. Thought she would reject me after telling me she havent study for the Research Methods test this Friday. All praise to Him who touched her heart and gave her that burden to turn up!

Anyway, Amy Lau's teaching about Moses today was a reminder to me that we always have thousand and one excuses to Not this and not do that but God ALWAYS have a response, a perfect answer to every single one of them, telling us why we should do it. Aint that powerful? Amen! :):)

got soya milk?

Tried expired soya milk before?

I did.

Expired by 5 days and my mum insisted that it was still ok to drink since it has not been open before...Being a good son and not wanting to waste food, i drank a big cup of "expired" soya milk.

Well what can i say? my stomach hurts now. dumb move dude...

wordpress tak boleh la...

Ok, i have finally moved from wordpress to blogspot.. why did i even choose wordpress in the first place? i dont really know but i think i just wanted to try sth different from others and maybe also because Shaza Amalina recommended it...haha...but now i know why the wordpress not popular liao. I spent 1hour plus trying to attach a tagboard to the blog on wordpress and only resulted in me finding out that wordpress cannot put tagboard! argh...anyhow, the 2 previous entries were written when my blog was called ihavenever. But that name has been taken in blogspot world so i have to change change name. hmm i prefer ihavenever actually...haha but nvm la, the new name also cool.

Today was quite a horrible day for me. Gloomy, blurry and cold...I felt lost the whole day la. seriously..everything was kinda going at ultra-sound speed while i was struggling to catch up. 1300: DSL carreer talk, 1430: project meeting with Prof Chew, 1 hr at comp lab, 1630: DG, 1800: Dinner, 2030: Korean lesson, 2300: home. yah, busy monday right? talk about monday blues...

And YES....my dear korean lessons khakis Huifang and weichen decided to jump at the FREE movie offer tonight and skip their korean lesson! leaving poor me going to korean class alone! Cant believe they actually pang-seh-ed me la... but coincidentally not many pple turned up for class today..maybe it's the cold weather.

Well, i have many things to do now so i better get down to it.

the "i have never" game (written on 10th march)

Just some random memory:

That day at Seo Hoon's bday party, the pfm 'gang' (valerie, cheryl, hf, wc, tsz ching & her bf and xqq) started playing a game called "I have never" after we cleared the table and were waiting for Seohoon to bring out her cake. Valerie initiated the game and explained the rules. They were simple: Everybody just take turns to say sth that he/she has never done before in her life and whoever has done what that person have never did, have to do a forfeit. So it's like a saboh game, in a sense..haha. It's normally played with alcohol as the forfeit but since seohoon didnt have drinks at her 21st bday, we were using xiaoqian's unfinished plate of cream pasta as the forfeit. (haha i dunno which is worse.. LOL) An addition rule was that whoever said sth that wasnt really true, he/she has to finish half the plate of pasta!

So the game started with Valerie.
"i have never scuba-dived before..." - few pple ate the yucky pasta. I was one of the few..

Cheryl: (haha i cant rmb...oops)

Huifang's turn: "i have never put on mascara before.." -most of the girls ate. (ok i cant remember whether it was mascara or eyeliner but samesame la.. haha)

Weichen: (ok this one was classic, real classic) "i have never written with my right hand before!" -thinking that she just made everyone ate a mouthful of pasta each, i asked wc "eh u REALLY never write with your right hand before meh? not even try and write see how it looks like?" wc paused and thought then started defending herself..but everyone else was already laughing, she have written with her right hand before, just bit ugly only...haha sorry wc! Good thing was she didnt had to finish half the plate of pasta...valerie the diva spared her..lol

Then it was my turn. Wanting to saboh all the girls, i said, "i have never wear pad before!" hahahahaha...immediately all the girls were grossed out. (me and tszching bf were laughing like mad) streams of protest started flying across the table..but haha rules were rules right? they all had to reach for the oh-so-delicious pasta of the day...

Then came tszching's bf turn. He said to me, "Joel, you inspired me." then proceeded to say he have never wear a panty or bra before! wahahhaha all the girls turned hysterical la!! admidst all the protests...the diva set out new rules and ban anything that was gender-bias..haha but soon after, seohoon brought out her cake and the game had to end prematurely..

All in all, Seohoon's birthday party was enjoyable. Games were fun, company was excellent but food was only passable..I wasnt feeling very well that day but i promised Seohoon to decorate her place and of course, i was kinda excited to exercise my creative juices! Banners, golden streamers, metallic-coloured balloons....everything was just put up impromptu, the making of a world-renowned designer eh? haha but seriously i'm glad Seohoon liked it. :)
(no pics to show though...for more graphical illustration go to http://jairebyc.blogspot.com/)

First post! (written on 9th march and moved from wordpress)

Well, i really never ever written a blog before. So this is my first time and hope it'll continue.
Hopefully, this blog will allow me to record my thoughts, about school work, about friends, about life, about God... Most importantly it will be a place for me to reflect, ponder and uncover. Reflect upon the things i have done, said and thought. Ponder about those stuff and ulitmately, uncover and learn something about myself.

Just recently, about 2 weeks ago, i wanted to give up. I wanted to give up chasing good grades, give up trying to be good in my projects, give up trying to be more confident during presentations, give up trying to be more patient, give up trying to read the Bible more regularly, give up being better. I was so tired. Tired of being unsatisfied with myself, tired of being told how to behave, what to do, what to say and what to think. i was tired of doing things to improve myself, to be that better person that everyone likes, to be someone that i can be proud of, that my parents can be proud of... i was tired of saying things to people that i dont mean, tired of placing people's expectation about me as top priority, tired of pretending that yes, doing all this will make me happier, accepted and belongED. i was tired of being tired. I felt suffocated and unhappy and dead.

So after dg one day, everyone left except me and David, my SM...He could tell that something was up and so he started the conversation by asking mundane things. Soon, i was tellling him my problem, my predictament. Funny enough, after he heard my story and all about wanting to give up, he just said, "then give up lah..give up!" I was shocked. I never knew it was that easy, that simple. All i had to do was just let go. to not care or bother or give a damn. i felt better just thinking about letting go. So i did it. The week that followed was recess week. And i did what i wanted to do for a very long time. I enjoyed life. David told me during the my sharing that i wasnt enjoying life, i wasnt enjoying the life that God gave me. A Christian life is not about being Godly and having all the Godly-traits. Having all the traits of a Godly person doesnt make you a good christian, a good follower of Christ. A good follower of Christ struggles with life not by his own might, not alone but by depending on God, on HIS strength and power. Even if life is caught up with manymany distractions, deadlines, unhappy relationships/friendships, stress....he will still hold on tightly to God's hands, to have faith that God's plans will work and will not be bothered by them but instead be able to enjoy life.

That recess week, i did the things i wanted to do. i did not do the things i didnt want to do. I did the things that made me happy and i avoided those that made me stressed and unhappy. I said the things that came to my mind first and i released all bottled feelings...It wasnt an uncontrolled freedom like wanna go take drugs and go Geylang type but it was more of a subtle-freedom. Those type of things that do already your mind feels released and not plain physical pleasure. That week was great and provided me with a good time of rest and recover.

2 weeks after recess week, i met up with Rudy, one of the staff from Crusade and subsequently told him what happened and was still happening. His response was that i was trying to break out from a structure, a shell of rules and dos and donts. I was forming my own rules coz i hated the ones that pple set for me. In his words, i was changing to become a man. Corny as it sounds, the process of "becoming a man" doesnt take place for many guys. most guys just live through life accepting what pple tell them to do and never ever question why. i wanted my own space, my own set of rules, i wanted to be a person that i like. So i accepted myself. I accepted myself as who i was and what i have. If i am too direct for other pple's comfort, so be it. If i am a boring person to talk to, so be it. If i am matrialistic, so be it. If that day i dowan to study, then dont study...I want to enjoy life and enjoy it to the fullest. I'm still struggling, still finding that set of rules i call my own. It might be tough, might be uncomfortable and I might lose focus...but im sure it'll all be worth it at the end of the day. Faith!